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A cowboy walked into a barber shop, sat on the barber’s chair and said, “I’ll have a shave and a shoe shine.” The barber began to lather his face and sharpen the old straight edge while a woman with the biggest, firmest, most beautiful breasts that he had ever seen knelt down and began to shine his shoes.
The cowboy said, “Young lady, you and I should go and spend some time in a hotel room.”
She replied, “I’m married and my husband wouldn’t like that.
The cowboy said, “Tell him you’re working overtime and I’ll pay you the difference.”
She said, “You tell him. He is the one shaving you.”
Chinese New Year is officially 18 days away.. And the Chinese New Year mood I get is from the local Malaysian radio station!! Luckily, they been playing Chinese New Year songs if not I think I will go mad thinking when is Chinese New Year.. I really not sure how it would be like to be celebrating away from family plus I am in the land of the Ang Mohs where Chinese New Year is not one of their main festivals. Meaning, Chinese New Year or not, still need to work la.. Luckily, I still unemployed.. but then again, not like I can go back Malaysia hor.. I better stop ranting about this before everyone stop reading my blog..
Just few minutes ago, got an email… from another fellow blogger, who decided to be my blogger friend after reading my post.. Happy or not.. That really made my day.. cause I able to expand my blogger friendships wider… I think I am on the roll now, don’t you think so?
Dunno why, I suddenly feel this home is lack of a pet… Yes! I know I been wanting a dog desperately but then can’t as I am living in an apartment like place. Hence, I was thinking something cuteee like rabbit or hamster… So what you think? I think my Boss Darling will surely object 101%.. because he got a lot of reasons and excuses.. Better scratch out that idea already.. hmphhh..
Last night, I manage to chat with one of my close friends on MSN. We known each other now since Form 4, that is nearly 9 years now. (Go figure out my age this year, if it wasn’t that obvious before.. lol). We were talking about random things and one of the things is about love and relationship. As you see, she ended her nearly 3 years relationship last year and she got over it very quickly. Actually, she said she did not really grieve over it and hence she labelled herself as the bad girl who has no emotions when comes to breaking people’s heart.
Hence, that keep me wondering, how much time do you need to get over your heartache? I known a guy who would go after girls he likes. If he finds out that he got no luck with the girl, he would just go after another girl. He said that “why want to waste time going after a girl if you know she won’t accept you. Might as well go after another girl who got a better chance.” I somehow half agree and disagree with it. Agree as there are plenty of bees or flowers to go for, no point wasting time to go hang around the one that rejects you over and over again. But then, with that attitude, people tend to label him as a playboy as the amount of time he takes from moving on from one girl to another.
Some people I know take ages to take over their heartache. One or two ended up being with a rebound girl or guy and then realised that they have no feelings for the lovers and hence ended up breaking their hearts. Is there an actually time frame for us to follow before we able to move on to another relationship? Few hours? A day? A week? A month? A year?
I guess it all depends on individual.. For me so far, with my previous relationships, it took me just days to get over it… Maybe because I was never serious in any of the relationships and back then, I was still naive and want to explore a lot of things. Back then, getting a boyfriend is a cool thing to happen especially if in your group of friends, you are the first one who dated. Hence, it was easier for me to get over it although I admit, I did cause some grieve and heartache back then. Now, I am more matured and know what I expect as well as I know what I want in myself. That’s why, I manage to maintain my wonderful relationship with Boss Darling.
But honestly, I do wonder, how much time is needed to heal your heartache and to move on in life again? How much time is needed before people starts labeling you as heartless or a bitch or a bastard and so on just because you move on quickly?
Lately, I been out of topic or idea what to blog about.. Maybe I need a blog break.. Maybe I need inspiration.. I don’t know… Give me inspiration! Argh!!
To be honest, nothing much interesting happen to me lately. My family back in Malaysia all busy preparing to usher the new piggy year, my year.. However, Queen Goat told me that nothing much was bought for Chinese New Year.. she didn’t even bother to get any new year clothes or any sweet and sour goodies for the house, as she said I am not at home hence no one will eat them besides me.. I guess no hanging of the Chinese New Year cards around the house as well since I am the one who usually does it.. It feels so different being away from home for Chinese New Year for the first time.. Really weird… I do wish I was home for the festival… Even Boss Darling knows how much I want to be back there but my current situation prevents me from doing so. To be honest, I am not sure when I am able to go back Malaysia as once I got my job, think it will be hard to take off for a month or more to go back.
I miss my family a lot.. I miss my dog Shandy miserably… I miss my friends so much… I think the coming festival is going to make me more upset and miserable for not able to go back to Malaysia… Guess, this won’t be the last time for me to be away from home for festivals… and I have to learn to deal with it, right? I guess I have to..
Male Translations..
“No, really, I’m OK to drive.”
–I’m wasted, and I am too embarrassed to have anybody see who I am going home with.
“I’m not used to these darts.”
–I’m not used to throwing anything smaller than a pool cue when I am this bombed.
“You get this one, next round is on me.”
–We won’t be here long enough to get another round.
“I’ll get this one, next one is on you.”
–Happy hour is about to end…now drafts are a dollar, but by the next round they’ll be $4.50 a pop.
“Let’s get out of here.”
–I just dumped a half a pitcher of beer into that Harley guy’s helmet.
“Can I get a glass of white zinfandel?”
–I’m gay.
“Ever try a body shot?” (Male to female)
–I am even willing to drink tequila if it means that I get to lick you.
“I’ve had like 10 beers already.”
–I’ve only had 3 but need an excuse to behave this way.
“Who’s got the next round?”
“Excuse Me.” (Male to female)
–I am going to grope you now.
“I’m out of here; I have to work in the morning.”
–I owe that guy who just walked in the door 100 bucks and have been avoiding him since football season.
“What do you have on tap?”
–What’s cheap?
“Can I just get a glass of water?”
–It’s 6:00 am and I just stopped drinking 1/2 hour ago. Hell, I probably dropped half of my paycheck in here last night, so it’s the least you can do for me.
A kid comes home from school with a writing assignment. He asks his father for help. “Dad, can you tell me the difference between potential and reality?”
His father looks up, thoughtfully, and then says, “I’ll demonstrate. Go ask your mother if she would sleep with Robert Redford for a million dollars. Then go ask your sister if she would sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars. Then come back and tell me what you’ve learned.”
The kid is puzzled, but decides to ask his mother. “Mom, if someone gave you a million dollars, would you sleep with Robert Redford?”
“Don’t tell your father, but yes, I would.”
He then goes to his sister’s room. “Sis, if someone gave you a million dollars, would you sleep with Brad Pitt?”
She replies, “O my god! Definitely!”
The kid goes back to his father. “Dad, I think I’ve figured it out. Potentially, we are sitting on two million bucks, but in reality, we are living with two sluts.”
Dear Uncles, Aunties, Brothers, Sisters, Leng Chais and Leng Luis of the blogging world..
I very the sampat now… and would love to know you guys more… Hence, I decided… to know you guys through MSN… Why MSN? Cause I am not in Malaysia.. so have to resort to the next best alternative.. Hence, you can send me an email to my gmail of your MSN email address or leave me a message here.. and I shall add you..
Of course, your MSN email addresses will not be published here… unless you want me to promote you in my blog.. hehe
By the way, you will notice that I got “My Blog Log” on my widget on the left side. Sign up and add me in your community, okay…
Thank you and love to hear from you, leng chais and leng luis soon… 
Love,
SiwwyPig
A drunk walks into a bar and says to the bartender (with a drunken slur), “Bartender, buy everyone in the house a drink,
pour yourself one, and give me the bill.” So the bartender does just that and hands the man a bill for $57. The drunk says, “I haven’t got it.”
The bartender slaps the guy around a few times then throws him out into the street.
The very next day the same drunk walks into the bar and once again says (with a drunken slur), “Bartender, buy everyone in the house a drink, pour yourself one, and give me the bill.” The bartender looks at the guy and figures to himself that he can’t possibly be stupid enough to pull the same trick twice. So he gives him the benefit of the doubt, pours a round of drinks for the house, has a drink himself and hands the drunk a bill for $67. The drunk says, “I haven’t got it.” The bartender can’t believe it. He picks the guy up, beats the living daylights out of him, then throws him out into the street.
The next day the same drunk walks back into the same bar and says (with a drunken slur), “Bartender, buy everyone in the house a drink, give me the bill.” In disgust, the bartender says, “What, no drink for me this time?”
The drunk replies, “You? No way! You get too violent when you drink.”
The Pigs and Cows who Oinked and Mooed